Monday, July 22, 2013

America’s Got Syphilis!


             “Of all the reality shows currently on the air this one debuts to a 50 rating and an 80 share…guaranteed or I’m a monkey’s uncle!” chirped the president of the Dirty O Network B.S. Walks. “This is the perfect storm. What could be better than a reality show that is an amalgamation of every reality show of the past 15 years all wrapped up in a weekly spectacular?”

            “America’s Got Syphilis has everything a reality show junkie craves,” Walks declared between bites of baby seal…”midgets, cunty housewives, ornery drunks, sub mental lowlifes, rancid, smelly hoarders, hairless gigolos, unsuspecting expectant mothers, jellyroll magnates, horny talent-less rappers, sassy domestics, surgically augmented narcissists. This will be the crowning achievement in reality programming or my balls will be in the wastebasket come Monday morning. Either way my epitaph has been written.

            This show will be a Roman rodeo with of all of the busted out, hair brained Americans (America’s biggest growth industry) who ever had the demented delusion that by being on television they would somehow be spared from their ignominious destinies. These true American freaks fight to the finish for the ultimate prize, any sign that their lives might have meaning, a tiny trophy, a small check perhaps or something even as little as when the tip of the thumb and the tip of the index finger meet forming the universal sign for OK.

Sir Alex Fraser Tyler: (1742-1813) Scottish jurist and historian’s 9 stages of civilization

1. bondage to spiritual faith
2. spiritual faith to great courage
3. courage to liberty
4. liberty to abundance
5. abundance to selfishness
6. selfishness to complacency
7. complacency to apathy
8. apathy to dependence
9. dependency back again into bondage

            Modern historians peg us at stage 7 (complacency to apathy). As a consumer society you can see how this might be true. From Plymouth Rock to the Revolution all the way through WW2 America ascended and triumphed against it’s foes from the real to the imaginary (the British, Japanese and Germany on the real side…Native Americans, North Korea, Iraq and the environment on the imagined side) Stage 5: the 50s: rampant consumerism, personal homestead fetishism, when death arrives “whoever has the most toys wins” sentiment…Stage 6:  60’s idealism quashed by corporate interests, bank law deregulation, focus on business and profit, vast, trapped middle management armies seeking relief from corporate Big Brother tyranny…disco, cocaine up the wazoo straight through the 80s, followed by corporate downsizing, shrinkage of the middle class, government subsidies for the arts attacked by government controlled big business and fringe groups, the arts finally remaindered or eliminated from school curriculums under the guise of fiscal responsibility. Stage 7: Public opinion completely manufactured and controlled by corporately controlled media and corporately controlled political process. Constituency hypnotized then yoked to state of the art technology...

                                               It ain't no myst'ry
                                               If it's politics or his'try
                                               The thing you gotta know is
                                               Ev'rything is show biz

                                               Adolph Hitler in Mel Brooks’ The Producers

                                               
            If politicians believe in their own manufactured beliefs about democracy how can we proceed from there? The belief in the illusion is integral to the success of the show. Once the show is accepted as reality…Don Delillo's White Noise comes true!

           Sorry America that’s the diagnosis. I don’t think we need a second opinion! Stage 8: apathy to dependence, is it here…now? Are we dependent on the superstructure as culture for all of our entertainment and opinions? The superstructure is always remodeling its citizens to mirror the whims of the superstructure. 

         Stay tuned after America’s Got Syphilis for a new reality show about a man whose passion is his work and his work is his passion…Dr. Levine Master Gynecologist!

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