Friday, August 2, 2013

Death Will Be My Santa Claus



When will it all end this great congestion, this constipation, this low hum that is daily life? 24/7 we are bombarded with a meringue of insignificance. Where is it all heading, the consuming, the making of garbage? Where is the time to lollygag or to think great thoughts or not so great thoughts? Can’t I spend a few hours not giving a shit? Can’t I just jack off for the sake of jacking off? Must it all have consequences?

Are you as sick of it as I am the never-ending din that threatens to choke out truth and beauty? Where is the silence that is never heard? Daily life is the constant preparation for all of the traditions and holidays that keep our noses to the cultural grindstone.

New Year’s Day
Martin Luther King’s birthday
Groundhog’s Day
Super bowl Sunday
Ash Wednesday
Valentine’s Day
President’s day
St. Patrick’s Day
Palm Sunday
Good Friday
Easter
Passover
Opening Day
April Fools day
Earth Day
Arbor Day
Cinco de Mayo
Flag Day
Mother’s Day
Memorial Day
Father’s Day
4th of July
Ramadan
Labor Day
Rosh Hoshana
Yom Kippur
Columbus Day
Halloween
Veteran’s Day
Thanksgiving
Pearl Harbor Day
Hanukkah
Christmas Eve
Christmas Day
Kwanzaa

In addition to all of the shit above we willingly double down:

Weekly visits to church/temple
Bar Mitzvahs
Confirmations
Births
Funerals
Christenings
Weddings
Birthday celebrations
Anniversary celebrations
College basketball
March Madness
Triple Crown of Horse Racing
Opening Day of Major League Baseball
NFL Draft
The Masters/US Open/British Open/PGA
The Australian/French/Wimbledon/US Open in tennis
The NFL season
The NBA season
The HHL season
NBA/NHL/MLB playoffs simultaneously
The NFL playoffs

That is quite a list. Modern culture is a Gordian knot of wish fulfillment. We so look forward to the events that the pleasure becomes anticipatory. The event itself never lives up to the thrill of the dream. Our culture spends so much time getting in the mood for events deep down it would 86 if had the balls. In all my adult years, there has never been a tradition or holiday that I’ve ever looked forward to…ever! To me, it is all intrusive. I never feel romantic on Valentines Day or generous during the holidays. Do I give thanks on Thanksgiving? Hardly! Mother’s day is a motherfucker. Super Bowl Sunday is almost a national holiday. To me these culturally sanctioned moments are just another way to blow a few sawbucks.

I’m a goddamn curmudgeon to be sure in the commercial/industrial complex. The game called modern life is a rigged one. The winners are the ones who are willing to embrace the warm treacle of this surface. I make no apology for my feelings on the matter. I just wish sometimes that the white noise would stop and I didn’t have an opinion on the Kardshians.

Americans are a forgetful lot. Give them a case of beer, some dip and a football game to watch and all is right in America and the world. After all, America is the world. I’m just thoroughly amazed that these citizens do not crave any more sustenance than what their loyalty to the strange force that keeps the train on the track provides?

Americans are always in their seats at game time ready to live their lives through the effort of others. Does humankind really believe that by buying in to the illusion is the ticket out of Palookaville? Visit Darfur the Palookaville of The Sudan. Ask the Sudanese about their March Madness or April madness or May madness. It’s always madness in the Sudan. Do you understand? I’m talking to you, yeah you, the yutz in the Ben Roethlisberger jersey with the nacho stains…




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